HOW CAN WE CONTROL OUR ANGER?

One scholar once wrote that “Anger and loss of temper are problems that all people face at all times. With some the problems are habitual.

the question which we need to ask  today;

Is it always sinful to be angry?

What does the Bible say about anger, wrath, blowing up, and clamming up? Should we vent our feelings to "get it out of our system"? Can we control our tempers? What guidance does God's word give in overcoming the temptations of anger?”

When we read the Bible James 1:19, 20 - …The problem with anger is what it "produces" or leads to.

WHY SHOULD WE NEED TO CONTROL OUR ANGER?

Proverbs 14:17 - A quick-tempered man acts foolishly. Not all anger is sinful, but we must take care lest we "fly off the handle," lose control, and act wrongly. [Prov. 29:22]

to control our thoughts and emotions, because harboring sinful thoughts will lead to sinful conduct. {Prov. 4:23; Matt. 15:18}

The problem with anger is that it may lead us to lose control of our conduct and speak out at others with foolish words that are intended to hurt others and may be regretted later. The bible tells us to act as a wise man be willing control himself, even when he is angry. what we need here is to control our thoughts.

 In a Godly way anger can be a sinful when it leads us to lose control so that, instead of being helpful to others, we become abusive, saying evil or hateful things intended to hurt them. Or we may simply not care about how we affect them. [Col. 3:8; 2 Cor. 12:20]

WHY WE NEED TO STAY AWAY FROM ANGER?

Let us recall the teaching of the bible from Genesis 4:4-8 Cain is an example. When God rejected Cain's offering but accepted Abel's, Cain became angry and killed Abel. Cain's anger was wrong, first because Abel had done nothing wrong. 

Anger at sin may be justified, but Cain was angry at someone who was righteous. Cain was the one who did wrong and was upset because God did not accept his conduct. 

Second, his anger was wrong because it led him to harm his brother. From this example what we need to practice is that “Wisdom and patient is the major foundation of controlling anger”

From the book of proverbs we learn that, on chapter 15:28 - The heart of the righteous studies how to answer, but the mouth of the wicked pours forth evil. Don't clam up, but don't just pop off whatever comes to mind. Give an answer, but study on it first.

Force yourself to analyze the situation and consider the consequences of what you might say or do. "If I say or do this, will it be good for others, or am I just angry and will regret the statement later?"

LET USE ANGER IN A POSITIVE WAY:

Be sure you are calm enough to say what is helpful. And if the other person loses control, then you speak in a way that shows you are under control. This will lay down a good foundation of discussion and will break the cycle, instead of attacking the other person, calmly say something to help him, not hurt him.

 But blowing up and attacking the person who angered you is the wrong action. Use your natural energy to work on the problem. Speak to help, not to hurt. Anger is often a deep-seated habit, but anyone can overcome it by diligent application of God's pattern.

 We should remember that anger is very destructive if you allow yourself to blow up and vent your anger upon another person. James 1:20 reminds us that  "cease from anger and forsake wrath; Do not fret, it only causes harm" (Psalms 37:8). Solomon also declares, "A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back" (Prov. 29:11). The use of anger in this manner is clearly a violation of God's commands, which ultimately hinders effective communication and relationship with others.

 Despite of frustration which comes with anger God wants you to deal with your anger and what is causing it, quickly, even before you go to sleep. This is what God was trying to get Cain to do when he asked him, "Why are you angry" (Gen. 4:6)? God knew that Cain was very angry and wanted him to identify its cause in order to help him resolve it. Without taking this action, sin would ultimately control him and cause an inevitable blow up.

Why we need to seek God’s forgiveness because of your anger?

You need to  control it if you don’t then I John 1:9 said if you are holding in anger and resentment, identify why you are angry and then take the appropriate biblical action.

 QUICK SOLUTION TO ANGER:

Choose to deal with the small issues before they build into resentment. Many times the failure to resolve small offenses with a person will ultimately lead you to those volcanic eruptions of anger and rage.

Choose to control and restrain your actions. Take a short time out when you realize that you, or the other party in the conversation, are beginning to get out of control. Solomon said, "It is honorable to a man to stop striving, since any fool can start a quarrel" (Prov. 20:3). Taking a time out will allow you and others to pray and get under control before blows up occur. This will entail walking away from the confrontation before you explode. Even Jesus walked away from the emotionally charged moment when the Jews wanted to throw Him off a cliff (Luke 4:28-30).

QUICK HELPFUL HINTS TO CONTROL ANGER

Grabbing, pushing, or have any physical contact with a person you are angry with is not a solution.

Take a timeout: If necessary, take a break from the person or situation until your frustration subsides a bit.

Once you're calm, express your anger: a  clearly, express way when you can talk about your frustration in non-confrontational way.

Get some exercise: If possible engage in physical activity which will help you to provide an outlet for your emotions, especially if you're about to erupt.

Think before you speak: Take a few moments to collect your thoughts before saying anything and allow others involved in the situation to do the same.

Identify possible solutions: Instead of focusing on what made you mad, work on resolving the issue at hand.

Therefore you always need to remember that anger happens to us all, but there are times when the rage feels out of control.

When you are angry you need to stop and think and asking yourself this question;   "What am I focusing the anger on?"

It is true that if honestly you can ask yourself this question can bring in your judgment the different level of tolerances and it will be higher. Sometimes you need to look at the bigger picture as quite often the problem we are angry is just because we can do nothing about the problem.

DO YOU KNOW THAT ANGER IN A LONG TERM IS A KILLER

 The problem of anger at the end of everything regret.

 as one write once wrote that it is true in order to throw mud at someone, you get your hands dirty first. in this situation the person who gets angry gets more disadvantages to themselves than the person they are angry at. 

Consider the health consequences: tension is bad and increases the likelihood developing bad health.

“BUT” WE HAVE ENOUGH TIME TO CHANGE:

Therefore find ways for more self-control of any situation and meditation and Relaxation.

Therefore Paul says Romans 12:19-21 Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay, "says the Lord. On the contrary: "If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head. 

"Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. Thus when we get angry, we should calm down and start doing what God has called us to do. You can be bitter or better—it's up to you! If you're mad about something, instead of letting it ruin your life, turn it into something good. 

Overcome evil and anger by praying for those who hurt and abuse you. Forgive them and be a blessing to them. It may not be easy at first, but when you make the decision and stick with it, God will take care of the rest.

Let us take one step forward by fighting with anger read the bible and it will set you free from this problem.